the most memorable conversations are ironically those i cannot remember. either due to my horrible memory fading them out of my mind, or due to the conversations being held while i was under the influence of benzodiazepines. sadly, thats the case for most of 2025. the night long conversations held on spains balconies, the first few conversations held between me and my first ever girlfriend, the conversations between me and the random people i decided to talk to on the street, that showed me theres more to experience in life than the monotony of your day to day, the girl of my dreams id never see again that gave me a cigarette and talked to me while i was having a panic attack. all of these are just fragments of memories in my mind now. like a few polaroids forever stuck in my mind. but the things i learned from theose experiences stayed. i wish i could tell you more, but some of the most important stuff i have experienced is forever lost and i can only hope to never make the same mistake again.