(1/3) When I drink, I can always be more authentically me, and care less about not having a mask up, but I regret it every single time. I’m used to suppressing, but it seems that when I drink and unmask, I drive people away.
I had friends over tonight, and so did my housemate. My friends were mutual, but my housemate’s friend was new to me.
When my first close friend left, and when my housemate’s friend decided to leave, it felt like it was because I got too comfortable, unmasked, and became too much. I’m still not sure my housemate isn’t super disappointed either.
We had drinks, and I hadn’t eaten since yesterday. Still haven’t. There’s something to be said about dopamine fuelled clarity when you’re running on ketones and alcohol (ND brains get it).
It’s one of those times it feels truly authentic. Modus operandi is broken and hopeless at this point and expects the worst to happen in every situation as a result of lived experience.
I had friends over tonight, and so did my housemate. My friends were mutual, but my housemate’s friend was new to me.
When my first close friend left, and when my housemate’s friend decided to leave, it felt like it was because I got too comfortable, unmasked, and became too much. I’m still not sure my housemate isn’t super disappointed either.
We had drinks, and I hadn’t eaten since yesterday. Still haven’t. There’s something to be said about dopamine fuelled clarity when you’re running on ketones and alcohol (ND brains get it).
It’s one of those times it feels truly authentic. Modus operandi is broken and hopeless at this point and expects the worst to happen in every situation as a result of lived experience.