I genuinely don't even know how I've gotten this far in life.

I genuinely don't even know why people like me. I just exist. I am .

Like beneath everything there's this creature that absolutely hates themselves and wants to be loved. Wants to be able to be cool like all their friends.

But I feel so isolated.

I'm still the kid who gets picked last. I'm that "they exist" friend.

It's how I feel in a lot of ways.

I'm thinking of just throwing myself at work so I'll at least have money. Idfk man.

Life's hard.

I'm apparently turning this into my livejournal lmaaaaao. Fuck.