yeahhh because when you were little the people you needed to receive care, attention and love from did not do their jobs. and when this happens the kids subconsciously start to believe that who they truly are and what they need are inherently unlovable. this belief isnt adopted as a complete fact, but it takes enough space to avoid relationships as we fear the rejection and pain that we have received in earlier relationships (with caretakers) will be repeated in any future interactions. you deserve scarab to tell you you are trying very hard, and that its okay to slip and do things youd rather not and that you deserve love no matter all your mistakes every time you wake up and see yourself in the mirror.