Ah, I see, thanks ! Is that how you personnaly view all conversations ? Or do you feel it just apply to a few types ?
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dawood π
2026-07-07 07:32 π³π±
Iβve sort of internalised it on a deep subconscious level, so I donβt really think about it, but if Iβm talking too much, I will, after a while, begin asking the other person how their day / week has been.
Not always though, sometimes itβs appropriate to keep going like if you just had a car accident or more positively just got back from holiday and are explaining how great it was.
I think this advice is super important to keep in mind for first dates, however.
Important to remember though, there are no real rules. Everyone has different preferences, Iβm just giving what I think are general averages.
Not always though, sometimes itβs appropriate to keep going like if you just had a car accident or more positively just got back from holiday and are explaining how great it was.
I think this advice is super important to keep in mind for first dates, however.
Important to remember though, there are no real rules. Everyone has different preferences, Iβm just giving what I think are general averages.
dawood π
2026-07-07 12:12 π³π±
I find the study of it kind of inscrutable, particularly the plague of body language experts there are online, but I am obsessed with it on a personal more intuitive level.
Basically, I get a lot more from people by their body language than the things they say.
Basically, I get a lot more from people by their body language than the things they say.
Yeah, finding good info/ressources about it is a bother, I've read a few books about it and a lot was contradictory or vague.
It's not entirely useless, though, I've learned concepts and methods I didn't have, even if I didn't learn extremely specific information. (Which doesn't exist anyway, since everyone's BL is different).
Any tips ? I'm autistic, so I purposefuly try to train myself at it to compensate.
It's not entirely useless, though, I've learned concepts and methods I didn't have, even if I didn't learn extremely specific information. (Which doesn't exist anyway, since everyone's BL is different).
Any tips ? I'm autistic, so I purposefuly try to train myself at it to compensate.
dawood π
2026-07-09 08:22 π¨πΏ
Pretty sure Iβm also autistic.
So Iβm not sure if I can help. I found that I got really good at it around when I turned 30. I think I now see things most people donβt, but there are probably things I miss that most can see, Iβm not sure.
The most important thing for me was learning that I didnβt have to understand why I thought that someone was feeling something. Iβm a very logical thinker, so if I get an impression of something, and I canβt break it down to understand why I think it is true, I find that very difficult.
Body language is a very intuitive skill. Intuition is very much about not knowing why you have a certain feeling. Itβs not verifiable, but it is has much more to tell us than logic.
So my only advice is to trust your intuition. It will be wrong, but the only way to make it stronger is to give it power over you, by listening to it. If you do that, you will gain more than any book can give you.
I thinkβ¦
So Iβm not sure if I can help. I found that I got really good at it around when I turned 30. I think I now see things most people donβt, but there are probably things I miss that most can see, Iβm not sure.
The most important thing for me was learning that I didnβt have to understand why I thought that someone was feeling something. Iβm a very logical thinker, so if I get an impression of something, and I canβt break it down to understand why I think it is true, I find that very difficult.
Body language is a very intuitive skill. Intuition is very much about not knowing why you have a certain feeling. Itβs not verifiable, but it is has much more to tell us than logic.
So my only advice is to trust your intuition. It will be wrong, but the only way to make it stronger is to give it power over you, by listening to it. If you do that, you will gain more than any book can give you.
I thinkβ¦