How do you cope with that permeating sense of dissatisfaction that comes pre-installed with life? The feeling that your body is off, your thought processes are off, that everything is hollow and meaningless because you aren't doing well enough? Achievements only elate for 5 minutes and then bring constant, unyielding shame that you could and should be even better, even if you're nipping at the heels of the best or are the best in a category?

Friendships feel empty, even if they're close, and nothing actually makes you happy. You wake up and go to bed running on guilt and obligation, not joy or any feelings of want. Anything you do like gets tainted with guilt and shame and dissatisfaction immediately. Colours feel muted, and things don't feel real.

Is this all there is to the rest of life?